Exploring grief and loss in a complicated world
Grief Articles
Remember Who You Are
After caring to dying people for over 17 years now, I have come to the conclusion that people are physically dying and awakening at the same time. We spend a great deal of our time defining ourselves in this work and making our way through it through the titles we obtain along the way such as minister, chaplain, counselor, etc... Much attention is placed on what we are. Such actions lead us away from the place we often will attempt to guide other's to in their dying after long years of experience in the opposite.The Ways We Grieve
To be known as we are truly known is not an afterlife experience. To be fully human and fully divine is one of the best kept secrets we all pretend we are not aware of until the afterlife. There is no afterlife. We came from eternity and to eternity we return. When we let go of the notion that eternity begins at death, we are free to utilize eternal resources to help us live in the here and now.Concentrate On Effort
Concentrate on effort. All of life is energy and information. Seeds of awareness are in constant growth. "Where one attention goes - energy flows." I am sure you have heard this many times. It is true. Life comes through you and not from you. Life is the greatest gift a person can receive upon this earth.The Importance of Focus
There are many distractions in the world. This would be a good day for you to focus. Focus on your needs, as well as, the needs of others. Keep the needs of yourself and the needs of the self in balance. You will notice that you and others have this need to keep life in balance.The Power of Prayer to Heal
On one occasion, I was asked to go into a room and be with a daughter whose Mom was dying. Mom was expected to die not long after I was to enter the room. When I went into the room, the daughter was at her Mom's bedside. She did die not long after I had entered the room. Her husband was on his way to be with his wife and daughter of this patient. He did not make it in time.Profile Information
- Relationship Status:
- Married
- About Me:
- Sam has cared for the needs of the dying in palliative care for over 17 years. During that time, Sam has served as the Chair, and now, Co-Chair of the Hospice Ethics Committee at a Hospice Care Center in Northern Ohio. He has served several years as a State Continuing Education Chairperson for the Association of Professional Chaplains. For well over a decade, Sam has been an active editorial review board member and contributing writer for Healing Ministry Journal, The Journal of Terminal Oncology, and The American Journal of Hospice and Palliative Care.
Sam began his speaking about spiritual care over 15 years ago and continues to speak at public engagements on the local, national, and international levels. He has spoken at several college campuses and keynoted at several Hospice Conferences. His first book of four "What the Dying Teach Us: Lessons on Living" is a Doubleday Book Club, One Spirit, and National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization selection.
Sam's undergraduate study was at Georgetown College with a B.A. in Psychology. He received his Master of Divinity @ The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky with an emphasis in the Pastor/Teacher track. In 2003, Sam Oliver finished his post-graduate certificate in Healthcare Ethics through Rush University in Chicago, IL. Presently, Reverend Doctor Samuel Lee Oliver is the Chaplain at a Hospice Care Center in Ohio.
- Website:
- http://www.soulandspirit.org
Imprints on my Soul
When I was a resident Chaplain at the University of Kentucky, I would often baptize those who were dying. On one occasion, I was given the task of baptizing an aborted child that did not make it through labor. I was given a small fetus in an empty room. This child was not much bigger than my thumb. I remember wondering what this infant's mother looked like and who was the father. What were they going through? I wondered who was helping them through their grief.
This fetus was given to me, so I could baptize him/her before further burial procedures were to take place. In the back of my mind, I began to imagine what this child's life would have been like if this child had of lived. What baring on the parents would all this create in their heart and in their soul?
There are several places for a person to find comfort and healing. Your local Hospice Care Program has several support groups with qualified therapists to assist you in sharing your grief. Your local hospital has social workers and chaplains to guide you through this difficult time. Also, hospital social workers have a list of groups in the community to give you in finding a caring group to share your grief. Your Minister and friends will help you too. And, if you have a pet, they grieve to. Give them attention. They will draw close to you.
In the meantime, be good to yourself. Eat right. Take walks. Take time to listen to your heart recall memories of your loved one who has passed on into a deeper place in your heart only your soul can embrace. There are several books on grief. Often we heal in the deepest parts of our being before we notice it physically. This journey into the heart is a predictable one. I would like to recommend my book "The Path into Healing: Our Womb of Creation." This is a book about the journey into one's heart and soul.
This event took place over 16 years ago. I can still remember this event as though it were yesterday. I was alone with this fetus and nurse. I did anoint this child. In a way, I believe the child anointed me as well. This child, to this day, has left an image in my mind and heart that lives and breathes through my recalling this story. This child has left an imprint on my Soul and shown me a way into Eternity.
Sam Oliver, author of, "A Fish Named Ed"
This fetus was given to me, so I could baptize him/her before further burial procedures were to take place. In the back of my mind, I began to imagine what this child's life would have been like if this child had of lived. What baring on the parents would all this create in their heart and in their soul?
There are several places for a person to find comfort and healing. Your local Hospice Care Program has several support groups with qualified therapists to assist you in sharing your grief. Your local hospital has social workers and chaplains to guide you through this difficult time. Also, hospital social workers have a list of groups in the community to give you in finding a caring group to share your grief. Your Minister and friends will help you too. And, if you have a pet, they grieve to. Give them attention. They will draw close to you.
In the meantime, be good to yourself. Eat right. Take walks. Take time to listen to your heart recall memories of your loved one who has passed on into a deeper place in your heart only your soul can embrace. There are several books on grief. Often we heal in the deepest parts of our being before we notice it physically. This journey into the heart is a predictable one. I would like to recommend my book "The Path into Healing: Our Womb of Creation." This is a book about the journey into one's heart and soul.
This event took place over 16 years ago. I can still remember this event as though it were yesterday. I was alone with this fetus and nurse. I did anoint this child. In a way, I believe the child anointed me as well. This child, to this day, has left an image in my mind and heart that lives and breathes through my recalling this story. This child has left an imprint on my Soul and shown me a way into Eternity.
Sam Oliver, author of, "A Fish Named Ed"
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